Bowling!

I went bowling a few weeks ago with friends and this was the result:

Dear Adam:

I could be embarassed, Ada.
I carried that seed for days,
until there was earth
and it was good.
I carried your rib,
heaved it sighing on credent sheets,
bore the burden on my back.

One rib less, I share your cage.
With the fruit of our labor we run,
troubled and tied.
Divided from your maker,
I grow divided. We are not two.

Making my own days.

The Sun woke me this morning loud
and clear, saying "Hey! I've been
trying to wake you up for fifteen
minutes. Don't be so rude, you are
only the second poet I've ever chosen
to speak to personally

so why
aren't you more attentive? If I could
burn you through the window I would
to wake you up. I can't hang around
here all day."

"Sorry, Sun, I stayed
up late last night talking to Hal."

"When I woke up Mayakovsky he was
a lot more prompt" the Sun said
petulantly. "Most people are up
already waiting to see if I'm going
to put in an appearance."

I tried
to apologize "I missed you yesterday."
"That's better" he said. "I didn't
know you'd come out." "You may be
wondering why I've come so close?"
"Yes" I said beginning to feel hot
wondering if maybe he wasn't burning me
anyway.

"Frankly I wanted to tell you
I like your poetry. I see a lot
on my rounds and you're okay. You may
not be the greatest thing on earth, but
you're different. Now, I've heard some
say you're crazy, they being excessively
calm themselves to my mind, and other
crazy poets think that you're a boring
reactionary. Not me.

Just keep on
like I do and pay no attention. You'll
find that people always will complain
about the atmosphere, either too hot
or too cold too bright or too dark, days
too short or too long.

If you don't appear
at all one day they think you're lazy
or dead. Just keep right on, I like it.

And don't worry about your lineage
poetic or natural. The Sun shines on
the jungle, you know, on the tundra
the sea, the ghetto. Wherever you were
I knew it and saw you moving. I was waiting
for you to get to work.

And now that you
are making your own days, so to speak,
even if no one reads you but me
you won't be depressed. Not
everyone can look up, even at me. It
hurts their eyes."

The southern bird girl

Today the wind smells like it did on top of that mountain when we thought the lightening would kill us.

.

Rags

They took your nail polish off
after I had painted them
wanting to be brave

In the face of you, ever mother,
needing mothering.

And still I just wanted your favor,
wanted you to smile proud;
I never considered the nobility
of your struggle and how much you hid,
wanting to be brave

In the presence of me:
"Take care and be taken care of,
never doubt that it's been enough,
and I am so proud."

/

surprised still by your shoulders
all stature, sunk in my senses;
stolen for granted, the form I stood against.

I opposed your imposition,
sore for my snideness tamed
by the one who saw it and still loved.
my words then were sour,
aimed to cut.
I bit, tasted my bitterness
and spat it back your way.

You stayed, stood and waited.
staid against my instincts
and still loved.

though I aimed to cut,
you had only words for grafting,
joining both our boughs
to a solid standing trunk,
rooted in (our own) stead.

.

Peripatetic:
the walker in apathy
or is it apostasy?
it's all in the patter
of feet, where they lead
and the apo of my strofe;
i may be turning downstream
but it's kata-strofe, and the current's with me.

my wonderful brother turns 16!!!

Today in greek i learned that 'I am the alpha and omega, the first and the last...' could mean the ruler and the one at a distance. Things lost in translation!

yum, msg.

I made one of my favorite dinners tonight with a different brand of noodles than I usually do. After looking at the label and wondering what the second ingredient on the list was, I went online. On the package it was called monosodium glutamate, but on google it is most commonly known as MSG. Then, wondering what all the hype about MSG was, I did some research.

Woah.

I won't go into details, but it reminds me of the frustrating relationship I have with food. We are more receptive to the foods we eat than we think; it affects us in more ways than we realize; and how can what we eat NOT play a huge role in our lives when it gets us from day to day?

Lent is over, but I'm not ready to give up on giving up. I want to maintain a healthy diet year-round. I want to be more closely in-tune with what I chose to eat, keeping in mind where it's come from and what it will do for my body, and not just for my tastebuds or food cravings.

<

at merge

Holy Rant

I am overwhelmed by how much my family has delved into the little details of the upcoming holiday, such as the necessity of having the right butter-lamb and a specific type of ham. This is not really a break from the ordinary; I am more surprised at how much I seem to have gotten swirled up into it, taking on more responsibility for a brunch than taking time to think about the magnitudes of meaning behind the holiday.

On a more hopeful note. I went - for the first time - to Mary's wednesday group. It seems like I couldn't have picked a better week to start going. As a wonderful group of women teach me how to leave baggage at the cross, I'm coming to better understand Easter, and more so - what it means to wear the dust of my Rabbi.

A stroke of insight...

Today, a video reminded me of how much of a gift the brain really is. This woman's story is touching and so beautiful:

Snow! I hope this means we'll get a weather swing for a beautiful Easter :)

more than just me

as inspired by steve, tamy, and mary, this blog will now have two authors...

:D

My favorite holiday...

...is april fools day only because of google's sense of humor. This is at least the third year they've done this :)

Oh my Mama

Oh my Mama
She gave me these feathered breaths
And she told me use your voice,
My little bird.

She did give me fancy feet
I'll be dancing on.
And I'll tap tap tap my toes
Into those creaking floorboards,

The Mamas
Give the waters of their wells,
Give the babies this very dirt we're walking on.

My Mama
She gave me these feathered breaths
And your Mama
She gave you those feathered breaths too.

And when the sky drops all those feathers
And when the birds sing in the morning
I'll be a mama,
I'll have a daughter.
And I'll give her melodies
And then my little bird
She'll fly.


(I didn't write this, but it's beautiful and it's sung by Alela Diane)

SPRING!

Something for calendars...

East/West

Today I discovered that the Elmwood Village is sort of sandwiched between two very poor and forgotten neighborhoods known as the East and West sides of Buffalo. The West side needs lots of attention and growth and seems to be headed that way. People are investing in homes and making them beautiful, starting block clubs, opening businesses. I believe change is already happening there.

The East side, though, is far worse. It's hidden behind Broadway, the area where countless people flock to in search of Easter goodies, unaware that such poor neighborhoods are close by. Shootings are frequent and the front doors of houses have marks of break-in attempts. I am not exagerating when I say this - almost every OTHER house is boarded up and spray painted as unsafe. These houses are forgotten by the city, but still look lived in by the homeless. On these streets, it's hard to distinguish what I see from pictures I saw after Katrina hit.



When there is this much need, it is daunting to even think of how to begin to help. All I know is that the way they are living is not okay. They deserve much more than they have. Maybe we could start by opening doors.

dear penpal:

so i'd send a text
put it next to a radio,
boomerang it's back again
with electric hooves.

this pony is express:
messages without wires
but no one misses
the sound of words over a line.

paper boomerangs instead
to a distant friend
sound like they're lost
but they carry more weight
and have further to go
before they can rest
in the comfort of like minds.

working with hands...

Since I expressed interest in guitar lessons about two weeks ago, I've had two people offer me guitars - so now I have one to borrow while a friend strings one for me to use. Tonight was my first half-guitar lesson with Mary and I'm very excited about it. It was a half-guitar lesson because there were two people with only one guitar!

I can't wait to incorporate more music into my life, it is so relaxing.

Also, Tamy offered to let me use her bread machine (Mine broke about three months ago). So hopefully there will be more bread-making in the near future too!

yesterday's sunset :)

my brother's message to himself... :)

Lent cont'd

So the bread worked out fine. It was really calming to be able to bake and I wish I could do it all the time.

My independent study professor had this observation about Lent:

Perhaps as a community we shouldn't be focused on what to give up that would deprive us of something and bring us closer to Jesus. Instead we should be actively thinking about how to better GIVE OUT; what can we give (time, help, food, hugs) to live a life more closely entwined with Christ?

I like that better. I like giving out better than giving up. And is it really a sacrifice of time, energy, whatever, if it's poured out to the people we love?

Not by bread alone...

Today I am making bread by hand.

...I'll let you know if I actually get bread out of this effort.

Rhetoric.

Where is the face of God
in our body politic?
To be less than least
and find a place apart,
following the stick in the spokes
of a rusty empire.